Sitting Out the Next Dance

I just can't do that anymore. I can't take it anymore. I have truly loved three women in my life who have left me in one fashion or another, one through actions that were beyond our control that left me on this pale blue dot and not her. The heartache and loss of trust has left me in a position where I am no longer willing to allow myself to feel that kind of loss and hurt again. It is just too great. I never thought I would find myself in this position and willing to forgo love or intimacy of any type. But here I am, broken and shell shocked, totally without hope or desire. I am alone and now choose to be that way for the rest of my life, whether it be 1 more day or 1000. It just doesn't matter anymore. I'm done. From here on out it is only me and about me. There will be no other to share my road. Good luck to those who have a dance partner. It is special. Never forget that. Never take it for granted. You never know when the dance will be over for good. For me, it is. I'll miss it but just can't take it if there was ever to be another and the music once again stopped. I honestly believe if that was to happen I would stop for good as well.