The Struggle Continues

I really am trying to just be a friend. It really isn't easy, but I am making a concerted effort. I am actually trying to change my life. And I'm doing it for me believe it or not. Since February I have lost 28 pounds. Just another 120 to go. Yeah, I'm a really big guy. I'm really watching how much I eat. I'm also starting to exercise and just be more active. In other words, getting up off my sorry ass.

Tomorrow is Father's Day. Well, I've been a decent father, but I definitely was not the best. I recognize that and try to pass on where I have found I failed. I really miss my father at times. It's been 7 years since he died. What happens when you die? Do you just stop and begin to decay? Does your spirit release and wander the universe? Do you have a soul that goes to a heaven or hell? Why must we be aware that there is an end? It seems so futile. I guess that is why so many people believe in an omnipotent being so they can live with the fact they are going to die one day.

I love HER. I try not to, but find myself so entranced. I look upon HER face and just cannot help but fall for HER beauty. Why must I be tortured so? So, I continue to try and be a friend. Just a friend. And the struggle continues....

Happy Father's Day to those who are or were. And best of luck to those who one day will be. And...try to be the best you can be.